Chapter 14: Mission

Keyboard Immortal

Chapter 14: Mission

“Of course not.” Cheng Shouping replied as he tiptoed and curiously looked across the crowd. “Divine Physician Ji is Miss Ji’s father. On top of being a gorgeous beauty, she’s also known to be a warm and kind person. She often provides free consultation for the poor, making her incredibly popular in the city. These people are likely here to catch a glimpse of Miss Ji.”

Zu An grumbled, “What gorgeous beauty? Even someone like Snow is deemed to be a beauty in your eyes. A mere study companion like you must have never seen real beauty before, or else your standards wouldn’t have been this low!”

Cheng Shouping’s face flushed in indignance, but before he could respond, a red-faced man amongst the crowd heard the conversation between the duo and turned his head around. “Oi, brat! What do you know? Miss Ji is a beauty whose reputation rivals Miss Chu from the Duke’s estate in our Brightmoon City! However, I heard that Miss Chu has recently married a useless wastrel, so there’s no point mentioning her anymore. Right now, Miss Ji is the only goddess in my dreams!”

Zu An’s face turned incredibly livid. How could this fellow insult him right in his face? He wouldn’t be a true keyboard warrior if he could take this lying down!

So, he stuck his ear over and made it look as if he was listening earnestly to the red-faced man’s words. Then, he replied with an incredibly loud voice, “What did you say? Miss Ji is the goddess of your wet dreams?”

Zu An was currently at the third step of the second rank, so his voice was much louder than an ordinary person. There was not a single person present who hadn’t heard his words, and they immediately turned their heads over.

This turn of events flustered the red-faced man. “What are you talking about? I’m saying dreams…”

Before he could even explain himself, Zu An had already cut him off once more, “Ah, that explains why you said that you wanted to steal Miss Ji’s possessions back home with you. My gosh, you are a disgusting excuse for a human being. Please stay away from me.”

As Zu An spoke, he pushed the red-faced man backward, as if trying to stay away from the latter. His true goal, however, was to throw the red-faced man into the hands of the infuriated crowd.

“I didn’t say that! I wasn’t…” Sensing the eyes filled with murderous intent centered on him, the red-faced man panicked. He tried his best to explain himself, but all were rendered naught when someone amidst the crowd shouted “Get him!”.

So, he ended up getting lynched by the crowd.

You have successfully trolled Lu Renjia for +666 Rage!

Zu An calmly tidied up his robe before leisurely making his way to the entrance of the residence.

Meanwhile, Cheng Shouping blinked his eyes blankly. This works too? As surprised as he was, he quickly rushed forward to catch up with Zu An’s footsteps.

It was then that a furious howl sounded from the residence. “All of you, scram! What kind of a cacophony are you causing in front of another person’s house in broad daylight! You’re disturbing this old man’s sleep!”

Following that, the tightly shut doors to the residence finally creaked open.

“Divine Physician Ji is out! Divine Physician Ji is out!”

The crowd who was pummeling Lu Renjia a moment ago quickly dispersed to surround the doorway once more, leaving behind a pitiful man lying on the ground with footprints all over him.

Zu An took a close look at the man who had just walked out of the residence. This man had a thin face that revealed hints of suaveness from his younger years. However, his untrimmed beard, the heavy eyebags he carried, and the heavy scent of alcohol on him that could be smelled even from a distance away made him look no different from a scruffy middle-aged man.

However, Zu An didn’t look down on him because of that. His ears were still ringing from his earlier roar. Without a doubt, the other party’s cultivation was far higher than his.

This is more like it. It’s clear that this man has the air of a hidden expert, similar to that drunk sword immortal. Except that his face isn’t that round.

“Divine Physician Ji, where’s your daughter?” A person standing by the side asked with a fawning smile.

Divine Physician Ji shot him a glance and asked, “Who are you?”

“Divine Physician Ji, do you not recognize me anymore? I am Wang Fugui! I often drop by your place!” That man hurriedly introduced himself.

“I don’t remember you.” Divine Physician Ji dug his ear before flicking his earwax off leisurely. “This Divine Physician only remembers the faces of pretty ladies. Why would I waste my effort remembering a mere moneybag… Cough cough, I mean, customer, you must have never paid any money here.”

Wang Fugui laughed a little before replying, “I have never patronized your business before, but Miss Ji has treated my illness several times…”

Before he could finish his words, Divine Physician Ji had already cut right in furiously, “Goddamit! I knew that it was weird how my business has been waning recently. It turns out that that damned lass has been treating all of you for free. All of you, scram!”

“Damned lass?” Zu An was surprised to hear those words. To refer to his daughter in such a manner, are they really blood-related?

“We’re here to look for Miss Ji, not you…” Under Divine Physician Ji’s glare, Wang Fugui’s tone grew a little meeker.

“She’s not around! I sent her out of the city to pick some medicine so that she’ll stop interrupting my business!” Divine Physician Ji pulled out a chair and sat lazily on it. “Those who want to be treated, either fork out 100 silver taels as consultation fee or complete my task. If you aren’t here to be diagnosed, you better get out of my sight right now. Or else, don’t blame me for getting nasty!”

Upon hearing that their goddess wasn’t here, the crowd gathered outside the residence quickly scattered. The way how they were quick to act showed that this wasn’t the first time such a thing had happened. A few individuals who earnestly wanted a consultation remained on the spot and begged, “Divine Physician Ji, we can’t afford to pay 100 silver taels. We’re begging you, do some good and have mercy on us.”

Divine Physician Ji took a sip from the wine gourd he was carrying. Without bothering to look at any of these people in the eye, he said, “I, Ji Dengtu, can treat hundreds of illnesses, but the illnesses that you are suffering from is beyond my means.”

A man amidst the crowd immediately panicked. “I haven’t even explained my symptoms to you yet, so how do you know that I can’t be treated?”

Divine Physician Ji finally raised his gaze to look at the man in the eye. “That’s because the illness you’re suffering from is poverty! How can I treat something like that?”

“You don’t have any of the virtues that a physician ought to have! How can you call yourself a divine physician?” That man’s face turned scarlet as he turned around and left in a huff. It was obvious that his pride had been wounded.

Meanwhile, Divine Physician Ji continued lying on top of his chair lazily while humming a tune. He couldn’t be bothered to respond to the insults hurled at him.

It was then that a man with a ratty face stepped forward and discreetly stuffed a picture book filled with vibrantly colored portraits into Divine Physician Ji’s hands. “Divine Physician Ji, I just managed to obtain this recently. It’s the newest edition of Heaven On Earth.”

Divine Physician Ji immediately sat upright. He snatched the picture book over and hurriedly flipped through it. Zu An, who was standing close by, was able to vaguely see pictures of scantily-dressed ladies inside the book.

“This isn’t too bad!” Divine Physician Ji stuffed the picture book into his clothes before patting the other party’s shoulder with a look of approval. “You may go in. I’ll treat you later on.”

This freaking works too?

Zu An was dumbstruck. I have Pimp of the Young Maidens, XX Records of Youth, Morphing Into a Dragon In the Face of Storm with me too… Do you want them? It’s just a pity that I can’t draw, or else I could just produce one and offer it to him… 

“Why is he able to enter?” The rest of the crowd who didn’t see the bribery complained indignantly.

Divine Physician Physician harrumphed with a stern face. “That’s none of your business. You want to enter too? Sure. Pay the consultation fee or finish my task!”

“But your task is simply too difficult! You’re just making things hard for us!” Someone complained.

It was then that Zu An noticed a signboard by the doorway labeled ‘Today’s Task’ that wrote: This Divine Physician is going to concoct a Ki Refinement Pill. I need 10 Assrip Wolf goubaos for my medicine.

Zu An had heard of goubaos before. It was a stone-like object that grew inside a dog’s stomach. It was usually spherical or elliptical in shape, and it was either ashen-white or grayish-black. It had the effect of soothing blood flow, clearing blockages, and detoxifying.

However, what in the world was an Assrip Wolf? Some sort of wolf mutation in the world of cultivation?

Hearing the complaints from those around, Divine Physician Ji looked at them as if he was looking at a bunch of idiots, and he said, “Do I look dumb to you? Why would I bother giving out tasks if they aren’t hard?”

The crowd immediately lost their patience, and they began speaking over one another.

“But every Assrip Wolf is at least at the second rank, and the leader of the pack could very well be in the third rank!”

“They always gather in packs which always contain anywhere between dozens of wolves to over a hundred! An ordinary person would only die against them!”

“Furthermore, goubaos are incredibly rare! One would be lucky to find a single goubao from 10 Assrip Wolves!”


“Shut up! You’re all too noisy!” Divine Physician Ji glared at the crowd. “It’s not that Assrip Wolves are powerful; all of you are simply too weak! If any of you were to reach rank four, wouldn’t you be able to clear this task within minutes easily?”

Veins popped out from the temples of the crowd as they hollered. “Any cultivator who has reached the fourth rank is already qualified to become a city lord! How can we possibly be compared with that kind of people?”

Zu An watched the sight silently from the side. From the infuriated statements of the crowd, he realized that most of the cultivators were at the second rank, and there were hardly any third ranks around. Using such a standard as a gauge, wouldn’t that mean that he was actually not that weak?

“Cut the crap. Do the task if you want, or else just get lost! It’s not as if I’m forcing any of you into it!” Divine Physician Ji lost his patience. “Stop blocking my doorway and obstructing my business. Shoo shoo shoo!”

Zu An pulled the arm of Cheng Shouping and asked, “This fellow is so arrogant. Isn’t he afraid of getting beaten up?”

Cheng Shouping was shocked to hear those words. He quickly put his finger up to silence Zu An before quickly pulling him off to a remote place. “Divine Physician Ji possesses unfathomable power. There has been plenty of impatient lads who have tried to strong-arm him into treating them, but do you know what happened to them?”

“Thye got thrown out?” Zu An asked.

Cheng Shouping put on a look that clearly expressed ‘You’re still lacking in imagination’ as he replied, “They’re all lying under their tombstones right now.”

“He’s that vicious?” Zu An stroked his lower jaw in astonishment. “Isn’t the magistrate going to interfere in this matter?”

Cheng Shouping explained, “Divine Physician Ji isn’t a divine physician for nothing. You don’t know how many experts are indebted to him over the years. Even the city lord has to show some respect in his presence. Not to mention, it’s those lads who tried to strong-arm him first, so the case was eventually dropped without any punishment.”

Zu An was still unwilling to give up just like that. “Is there really no way to complete the task?”

“Of course!” Cheng Shouping replied matter-of-factly. “Those who are weak don’t have the ability to complete the task, and those who are strong could simply pay the consultation fee instead of wasting their time on the task. There were simply too many people who had complained about his consultation fee. So, he came up with these impossible tasks to stuff their mouths.”

“No wonder!” Zu An nodded in realization. That Ji fellow had set those tasks with the intention of having them being impossible to accomplish for the common populace in the first place!

Wait a moment! A thought suddenly flashed across Zu An’s mind, and he immediately shot a glance at Cheng Shouping. This darned thing knew that it is impossible for me to accomplish the task, yet he didn’t give me a heads-up before bringing me here. He must be doing this in order to meet Miss Ji.

Zu An’s face turned dark, and he said, “You should return to the Chu Estate first. I’ll walk around by myself.” His happiness was at stake here, so he had to give it a try no matter how tough it was! He had the Poisonous Prick and the Poison Bottle anyway. As long as he was careful, he might just be able to complete the task.

Of course, he had to make sure to do it behind the back of the Chu clan. The Chu clan thought of him as nothing but trash, and there were enemies lurking in the shadows who were out to take his life. If they were to learn that he had managed to raise his cultivation to the second rank, they would surely go even further the next time around.

Lying low is the key to survival!

Cheng Shouping was astonished. “Young master, you aren’t thinking of attempting the task, are you?”

Zu An wondered if he had made it obvious through his actions, but before he could come up with an excuse, Cheng Shouping had already hurriedly spoken up, “Young master, do you know why those wolves are named as Assrip Wolves?”

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