Chapter 71: Knock-You-Up Eyes

Keyboard Immortal

Zu An blinked his eyes. “Perhaps it’s because of my good luck?”

It wasn’t exactly a lie. He did win the bets due to his good luck, just that he didn’t specify the deeper reason behind his good luck.

“Good luck?” Old Mi frowned. Clearly, such an answer didn’t satisfy him.

“What else could it possibly be? I can’t possibly cheat under the eyelids of those veteran dealers of the Silverhook Casino, right?” replied Zu An.

Old Mi thought that those words made sense. He did know the limits of Zu An’s capability, so he decided to let the matter go and leave the room. However, before walking out of the door, he said, “For the next few days, don’t head out if you don’t need to. You have a debt note of 7,500,000 silver taels on the Pum Blossom Sect. They won’t let you off that easily.”

Zu An felt a surge of warmth in his heart as he wondered if he had misunderstood this old man. Looks like he still cares for me. He doesn’t covet my wealth despite knowing that I’ve struck it rich.

Little did Zu An know that there was no need for Old Mi to covet his wealth. After all, the money would all be his once he possessed Zu An’s body in the future.

Once Old Mi left the room, Zu An quickly closed the door shut and double-checked that there was no one else in the room before washing his hands and face. With that, he was ready to start drawing the lottery.

He took out the keyboard and prepared himself to press down on the ‘Enter’ key, but he suddenly noticed that there were some changes with the keyboard. Taking a closer look, he noticed that there was a notification.

You have successfully accumulated a total of 100,000 Rage points. The ‘Alphabet’ will be unlocked for the lottery drawing.

Zu An was stunned for a moment before frenzied joy broke out in his heart. Didn’t this mean that he could draw items from the alphabet now? One must know that the Heiress’ Ball of Delight and Poison Prick might look like troll items at first glance, but they were actually incredibly useful. It was likely that any random tools he obtained from the keyboard would be pretty decent.

With anticipation welling up in his heart, he started the lottery.

Unsurprisingly, the result was ‘Thanks for playing!’, but that did little to dampen Zu An’s excitement. He had seen with his own eyes the light marker moving across the alphabets on the keyboard, which proved that it was possible to draw something on them.

So, he continued the lottery without any hesitation.

Thanks for playing!

Thanks for playing!

Thanks for playing!

… 

Congratulations, you have won a ‘Ki Fruit’!

… 

Thanks for playing!

Thanks for playing!

… 

Soon, Zu An was able to come to a conclusion. The chances of drawing a Ki Fruit were around 1-in-10 whereas the probabilities of drawing a Poison Bottle, Fortune Pill, and Faith in Brother Spring were uncertain. 

Some time later, Zu An’s excitement started to fade. He hadn’t received anything else other than ‘Thanks for playing!’ and Ki Fruits thus far.

I have enough Rage points to draw the lottery 602 times. I can’t be so unlucky as to be unable to draw anything new at all, right?

As soon as this thought arose in Zu An’s mind, he quickly slammed his palm on the nearby wooden table and shook the thought with his head. What in the world am I doing here? Touchwood! I can’t be raising flags like that!

Fortunately, on his 500th or something draw, the light marker finally stopped on the alphabet ‘D’.

What could it be?

With a heart filled with anticipation, Zu An quickly looked at the item he had received, only to see a pair of thin transparent lenses that looked oddly like contact lenses.

Congratulations, you have won a ‘Knock-You-Up Eyes’!

“???” Zu An.

The last few experiences had given Zu An a glimpse into the ridiculous naming sense of the keyboard, so he wasn’t too surprised by the announcement. Instead, he quickly headed on to read its description.

Knock-You-Up Eyes: Together with an expert who goes by the surname of Song’s ‘Thousand Li Chastity Robbing’, this item is renowned as one of the ‘Ultimate Insemination Duo’.

Artifact Effect: When you are wearing this item, you may select whether to activate the item’s effect when you are staring at a target. As long as you exchange glances with the target, the latter will immediately experience the labor pains of delivering a 10-month-old child. This effect doesn’t discriminate against gender or race, and it will last for an hour before the pain subsides. Uses: 3

Black streaks flashed across Zu An’s eyes. To be honest, he would prefer to obtain the ‘Thosuand Li Chastity Robbing’ skill instead. He had no idea who the expert was, but he was definitely worthy of respect.

Still, this ‘Knock-You-Up Eyes’ looks pretty useless. It only makes the target feels pain; it doesn’t deal any actual damage at all. What’s the use if the individual is going to recover once the duration is over?

It honestly feels more like voodoo magic to prank a friend… 

But again, Zu An soon came to realize that this skill could work wonders during critical moments. He remembered reading a scientific study in his previous world that divided the level of pain experienced by a human into 10 levels, and the pain experienced during childbirth was used as the highest level. The scientists developed a machine that simulated the pain of childbirth, and many of the men who attempted it—whether out of love for their wife or being forced into it as vengeance—ended up crumbling to the floor, crying out loud.

He could use this item to incapacitate his enemy during a critical moment in a battle and turn the tides around.

It was just a pity that this item had a limit of 3 uses, which meant that he couldn’t abuse it.

Another thing he was wondering was if this item could work on multiple people at once. If he were to use this item in a situation where he was glaring at multiple people, would he be able to incapacitate them all at once?

All sorts of imageries surfaced in his mind, and he broke out into deranged laughter.

Anyway, Zu An turned his attention back to the lottery, but the light marker never fell on the alphabets anymore. All in all, he managed to draw 58 Ki Fruits.

He swallowed the Ki Fruit one after another and relished in the feeling of ki gushing through his body. The second formation of the third formation swiftly began filling up with golden matter, but there wasn’t enough ki to make it full. It eventually stopped at around two-thirds.

Based on the Law of Fibonacci Sequence, the second formation needed 89 Ki Fruits. He had already filled it up a little previously, and adding in the 58 Ki Fruits he had just eaten, he would need around 20 more or so in order to make a breakthrough.

Zu An couldn’t help but feel a little frustrated. It wasn’t easy for him to earn 60,000 Rage points, but it couldn’t even fill up a single formation. On top of that, things would only get harder later on. It would take an astronomical sum of Rage points to fill up every single formation. He couldn’t imagine just how long it would take for him to reach the higher cultivation ranks.

He stretched his body a little to test out his newfound strength. Currently, he wielded the strength comparable to 200 grown men. He felt that he was becoming superhuman, but then, he recalled how the cars in his previous world boasted hundreds of horsepower. With the bit of strength he had, he wouldn’t even match up to the force of a car traveling at maximum speed.

But looking at it from another perspective, now that he had started comparing his physical ability with cars, he couldn’t be considered as an ordinary mortal anymore. Once again, he found himself wondering just how terrifying the power of high-rank cultivators in this world was.

To be honest, Zu An was lacking common sense on that aspect. Higher rank cultivators gained the power to tap into the raw ki around them, so it was no longer accurate to gauge them by ‘humanpower’ anymore.

Having finished drawing his lottery, the bored Zu An decided to drop by the Reflection Room to see how Cheng Shouping was faring. He was a little curious to see how many people the latter had hired.

But when he finally arrived at the entrance of the Reflection Room, he saw Cheng Shouping gritting his teeth as the brush in his hand flew swiftly around. He was all alone inside the room.

“…” Zu An.

This fellow is really nuts for money! He can’t even bear to take a bit of money out to hire someone else to help him. But since that’s what he wants, so be it.

So, Zu An turned around and returned back to his residence. He headed straight for his room, and just as he was about to enter it, he suddenly noticed a broken strand of hair on the wooden door latch and froze on the spot. 

Ever since he found out that someone on the Chu Estate was out for his life, he had been keeping his guard up. Every time he left his room, he would set up a small mechanism to check if someone had tried to sneak in—and the mechanism had clearly been triggered. 

Right now, the question was whether the person who had snuck into his room was still inside.

So, Zu An slipped the Poison Prick into his sleeves before carefully pushing the door open and heading in. It just so happened that he had just made a breakthrough and wanted to test out his strength.

As soon as he walked in, a gust of wind assaulted him from behind. A black silhouette suddenly charged at him. The prepared Zu An quickly rolled away before directing the Poison Prick toward the black silhouette.

The black silhouette didn’t expect her assassination attempt to fail, and Zu An turned out to be faster than she thought. As a result, she failed to dodge in time and ended up getting stabbed.

However, Zu An was hardly pleased with the situation at all. He sensed that the tip of the dagger had failed to pierce into the black silhouette’s body.

“Hm?”

The black silhouette had already backed off several meters to crouch on top of a table. Her exclamation revealed her astonishment. Zu An’s swift reflexes were at odds with the wastrel impression she had of him, and the dagger he brandished was actually sharp enough to pierce through her Ki Armor, slicing right through the fabric of her clothes. Had it not been for her swift movement, she would have already suffered some damage by now.

Zu An was also assessing the black silhouette intently too. The latter was dressed in black cloth, and her hair had been carefully wrapped together to avoid giving away any hints of her identity. Nevertheless, from her crisp and pleasing voice, he could tell that he was a woman, likely a beautiful one at that.

Her eyes were hidden beneath a veil, but Zu An was still able to discern something familiar from them. A spark flashed across his mind, and he remarked instinctively, “Snow!”

The black silhouette jolted at that name. She slowly took off her mask, revealing a frosty face. “You’re actually a cultivator?”

Zu An had reacted faster than any mortal possibly could earlier.

In response, Zu An chuckled softly and replied, “Aren’t you the same too?”

“I always thought that you were a wastrel, but it turns out that you’ve been putting on an act thus far. What are you scheming over here?” Snow growled deeply.

Zu An sighed deeply and replied, “A powerful cultivator like you is actually serving as a mere maid in the Chu clan. I should be the one asking you what you’re scheming.”

“Forget it, it doesn’t matter. You’re going to die tonight anyway!” Snow harrumphed coldly.

Zu An immediately refuted indignantly, “Aren’t you a vicious one? We might have our differences, but it doesn’t change the fact that we had once shared a bond of skinship with one another. As the saying goes, a day as a couple, a hundred days of gratitude…”

Before he could finish his words, Snow had already interjected in, “Shut up!”

You have successfully trolled Qiao Xueying for +444 Rage!

That matter was a thorn in her heart. Every night, whenever she dreamt about how her pure body had been defiled by those vile hands, she would jolt awake in the middle of her sleep.

Due to all of the verbal quips they had over the last few days, she subconsciously responded to Zu An’s provocation reflexively, “You aren’t even a man at all. Where do you find the courage to say such words?” 

As she said those words, she shot a disdainful glance between his legs, making sure to express her full scorn for him. 

She thought that her actions would either drive Zu An to a state of fury or make him wither in embarrassment, but unexpectedly, the latter was completely unfazed by the insult. “Even though we didn’t do it in the end, I reckon it can at least count as half a day of couplehood. That would equate to at least fifty days of gratitude. How can you be so heartless as to assassinate someone you owe fifty days of gratitude to?”

What the hell! Is that saying even supposed to work proportionately?!

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