Chapter 23: Leaving for the Heavens Law Branch (3) XTB's Thoughts


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Chapter 23: Leaving for the Heavens Law Branch (3)

Lilac snapped her fingers and a stack of materials appeared in her hand. With a casual wave, they flew into everyone’s hands, unable to be refused. She laughed, “This is the CSIB’s specialized introduction. Everyone, please relax, we’re China’s civil servants. Remember how the civil servant exam was all the rage several years? There’s a solid difference between us and some field chicken organizations. The benefits and retirement guarantee are better than what anyone else can imagine. Even if everyone stops at Qi Condensation—and believe me, eight out of ten cultivators stop right before Foundation Establishment like me—all of you will have the same opportunity as I did, and that is to become a VIP.”

This was multi-level marketing, right? Right?

These words turned in everyone’s hearts several times, but no one said a thing.

Xu Yangyi simply didn’t care whether or not Lilac was a multi-level marketer. He only cared about one thing—would the CSIB be able to bring him a real advantage? His first course of action upon receiving the papers was to look at the short seven-page CSIB introduction and the list of famous cultivators. It seemed that CSIB could make things sail smoothly.

The first line on the eighth page was a row of large characters: Beijing University, Huaqing University, and the tenth greatest educational institution in China have joined hands to establish the cultivation world’s largest lecture hall for the latest issues ranging from Biological Transformation to Darwin’s Theory of the Analysis of Demon Weaknesses

“Huff…” Xu Yangyi gently exhaled and forcefully clenched his fists.

This was something he definitely desired! And it seemed that there were no strings attached? No, no way!

He understood if clearly. Since ancient times, each demon carried a core. They had their own demon forms, and these demon forms… were biological organisms!

If it was a living entity, then it had a weakness.

Biological organisms were divided into many classifications: kingdom, phylum, class, order, family, species, and under species there was also subspecies. Vegetation also had variants, and every category had their own suborder and subclass… This dazzling lineup was the origin of a demon’s root!

In the last several eons of changes in Earth’s history, every demon, every ancient fossil, had an origin that abided by the Earth’s epochs of history. Xu Yangyi had always been very understanding towards his own position, never faltering.

And that… was as a true demon slayer. One didn’t take action until they could guarantee a sure-fire kill. He continued to read.

It was obvious that the CSIB’s ace was their favorable connections to university resources and famous Chinese biologists and geneticists. This publicity material was of their own sufficient effort. For example, the second article: ‘Evolution of Demons, Territory Awareness, The Comparison of Hunting Grounds and Natural Organisms, and as well as Discerning Future Routes’. 

The third article: ‘Huaqing Biology, International Sociology Professor Cao Liangwei in Regards to the Complements Between Human Society and Demon Society, Competitions, and the Definition of Mutual Expulsion’.

The fourth article: ‘How to Find Concealed Demons in Human Society with Taobao, QQ, and WeChat in the Progressively Interweaving Information Age. How to Distinguish Whether They Erased Their Tracks’.

“Pretty interesting…” Xu Yangyi’s eyes slightly flashed. He was quite willing to listen to what Lilac had to say next. At the very least, the released bait did indeed stoke his interest. However, Lilac’s voice didn’t ring out again while the students discussed this new information. As Xu Yangyi lifted his gaze from the materials, a snow-white hand was already cupping his chin.

“How about it? Interested?” Lilac’s charming face came closer to his, and her rosy lips leaned on his earlobe, almost a mere centimeter away from sucking on it. One could even imagine that her nimble tongue was like a true lilac, tracing an arc over his ear.

Everyone’s gaze swept over nonchalantly, clearly unable to understand why Lilac seemed to have a special interest in the last person who had arrived.

Were there a few number of champions? There were twelve cities in Nantong Province, equal to twelve champions! There was one even sitting at her side, but on the contrary, why hadn’t she recognized him like Xu Yangyi? 

“If it’s interesting…” Lilac’s sweet shoulder bumped into Xu Yangyi again, and she twirled her hair around her hand. A languid enthrallment seeped into her husky voice. “Won’t you consider our unit? Yuyang City’s champion, Student Xu Yangyi? Big sis will be waiting for you~”

“We’ll even make an exception… Are you not planning…” Lilac pursed her lips and snapped her fingers. A sheet of paper unhurriedly drifted over… into her bosom!

Lilac’s deep cleavage squeezed down on the sheet of paper, and she winked. She said lowly at the side of his ear, “Are you not planning on giving big sis an answer?”

“This is a specially drafted contract for a champion. Other contracts won’t be the same; it won’t have big sis’s digits on it~”

“Oh? I was wondering why Zuo Lun was so willing to have tea with me. He even said it was the newest tea gathered from Mount Emei…” Before Lilac even finished speaking, grim laughter was heard coming from the door. Just as this snicker fell, it immediately turned into a fierce shout. “Scheming whore, begone! Our Featherwood Guard hasn’t even recruited anyone yet; when did it become your turn?!”

Everyone was dumbfounded. Xu Yangyi took advantage of the situation to break away from Lilac’s clutches, calmly surveying everything.

No, no, no… let’s straighten out our thoughts; what the heck is going on? None of them had even graduated, but they had been given pamphlets… Moreover, it wasn’t just one person who had been sent but two?

Wasn’t the CSIB a state agency? Was there another even more powerful unit?

“Are you trying to flush ‘em out and trap them by not giving them the full picture?” The person who had come was around thirty years old, a woman with short hair and a square face. In the same camouflage, she appeared like a man, and her voice was relatively coarse as well. “Hmph, Lilac, you’ve got the nerve to try and fool these young chicks?”

Looking at her appearance, the students, who were just listening to a silver bell-like voice with boundless expectation, suddenly jolted up in their seats with straight backs. The transformation from silver bell to barbell was far too swift. So fast that they couldn’t accept it.

Lilac snorted coldly, “Little chicks? Students, listen up. The Featherwood Guard thinks of all of you like that! We’ll treat you as colleagues, but she’ll take advantage of you without your consent!” [1]

“I can’t be bothered with your crap.” The short-haired woman’s speaking skill was evidently nothing to brag home about. She turned her head and looked at everyone. “Greetings, students, I’ve come to introduce myself. I’m C-Hibiscus…”

“All girls are designated based on flowers. Our Featherwood Guard isn’t like those pansy-ass government departments. Everyone, have you ever thought about the question: ‘how long would it take to respond to a problem if you joined a government branch’?”

“For example, you find a spirit stone vein—hey, don’t look at me like that, it’s just a lucky bullshit example. There aren’t many spirit stone veins on the entire Earth; it’s nothing but a figure of speech.” Hibiscus glanced at a student. “At the same time, though, what would happen if someone saw one? Report it to the government branch? Haha… They would wait, right? Wait a month and see if they could get on it or not. But by the time that moment comes, everything would’ve already been cleaned out!”

“But our Featherwood Guard ain’t the same! We don’t got so much red tape, and we’re one big guild. Our president is a Chinese Core Formation expert, an existence at the peak of the world! You feel like doing something, sure, then go do it, go snatch it! But once you take possession of it, you have to keep on reporting it to the guild. You guys think that if you join the CSIB, you’ll be able to take action straightaway if you don’t wait on instructions from higher-ups Who’ll pardon you when the blame falls on you because there are four other Dao Masters?”

“Hehe… Nothing but a pack of mercenaries moonlighting as private detectives. What are you doing trying to fluff it up?” Lilac was disinclined to feign the slightest courtesy as she riposted with equal harshness. “Their treatment and research techniques are totally unable to match up to our unit’s! Any mission that is accepted and accomplished will have a bonus upon completion! But what if the mission isn’t completed? Hehe… sorry… even if the mission is a success, does everyone dare to guarantee they can finish a mission every time without a scratch? Their unit doesn’t have an occupational injury organization, and to be specific, they don’t even have retirement insurance! AND, they don’t provide medical insurance! Their irregular standards is the extreme point! They can be simply classified as an impoverished rag-tag group!”

“However, commissions for our lowest missions start at 5 million US dollars!” 

“Hahaha, it really is a huge joke. Like setting up a stall in a Japanese supermarket and boasting about how rich they are.” Lilac chuckled with her waist bent over. “Has everyone thought of where spirit stones come from? Have you thought about where those priceless treasures originate? I’ll tell everyone that the CSIB has a special operations office known as the Office for Special Geological Exploration. If any of you are sure that some place has a spirit vein or rare treasure, you can use them for surveying. Of course, all of your gains will all belong to you. Other wildcat organizations don’t have this condition. Our special exploration office, hehe… These words are unpleasant to listen to, but our ancestors have been dealing with those things for a long time now.”

She paused and looked at Hibiscus provokingly.“Do you know about the Wealth Repossession Captains? All of them work at the CSIB!” [2]

“I can’t be bothered with your crap!” Hibiscus snapped and yelled, looking deeply at everyone. In a similar fashion, she snapped her fingers, and a stack of resources appeared, flying into everyone’s hands. “The Featherwood Guard and the CSIB can both be called one of China’s Big Three. Our history is as long as theirs, and our hotline number is 010-8675-2341. I welcome any student to consult us…”

Hibiscus spoke while rummaging for a doubly thick folder that swiftly came out from her pile of resources. Lilac’s eyes glimmered, and she took out the contract from her bosom with a swish. Just as Hibiscus was about to brusquely foist the folder onto Xu Yangyi, it was slapped away into the air by Lilac.

The CSIB’s contract was placed before Xu Yangyi.

“You wanna go?” Hibiscus slammed the table, her eyes glowering.

“Why don’t you come try me?” Lilac sneered and stood up, not losing out on might in the least bit.

In the aircraft, two equally formidable waves of spiritual pressure seemed to grind against one another like a millstone. In kind, both were similarly matched.

“What? If you wanna get the rest, then take ‘em, but you wanna snatch up two champions, as well? I’ll follow you straight through eating, talking, and sleeping. You wanna squeeze in and seal the deal? I’m gonna sit at his side, too!” [3]

Xu Yangyi silently took the folder and swept his eyes over it, yet he didn’t have the time to look at it carefully.

“Hehe, who doesn’t want a champion? Even if one doesn’t pass the graduation exam, based on their branch recommendations and school credits, they’re an important training target! Speak less of your haves and have-nots, the Featherwood Guard must get these two!” 

“Psshh… They’re yours just because you said so? Is the CSIB worst than your Featherwood Guard in the slightest? Has there ever been a time that we haven’t been generous when we chase after talents?” 

“Just on the basis of your bloated government agency?” 

“Psshhh… And on the basis of your ragtag circus that’s better kept under the table? Let me ask, can you provide people with the opportunity of a study abroad exchange? Can you provide them with a government-issued medal? Can you grant them systemic provincial-grade treatment? Low-class things will never do for high-class needs!” [4]

The silver bell and the barbell collided. As this sudden confrontation came out in full swing on the aircraft, the two women were soon sticking together face-to-face, scowling coldly at each other. Everyone else said nothing more.

“So in the end, it all comes back to Number 9310’s report that he killed a berserker, huh…” Finally, Hibiscus chuckled in bitterness, keeping her voice under control so the others couldn’t hear her. “Ten years ago… Eleven years ago, a mutant maneater appeared in Runjiang City. After the examinee died without even leaving behind a whole corpse, there’s never been another exam deviation since then, not to even mention one where the target was killed. This is the first time after ten years, but you’ve really set your heart on this more than me, huh.”

“So what?” Presently, the two of them had simply torn up and thrown away the most fundamental of face and respect outside the window. Already, Lilac had completely abandoned her desire to keep up pretense, jitterily kicking the handrail on the side. With a boom, the steel handrail suddenly bent.

She looked at Hibiscus coldly. “Momma is warning you, ugly. That Chu’s background is great. I don’t want to give him up to you, but the CSIB Nantong branch mentioned that Xu can’t be lost by any means! You dare try scrambling over him with me?!”

“Is mama afraid of your CSIB? You might’ve scared the rookies more or less, but you want to scare me?” Hibiscus glared and shot back hatefully. “That Chu is yours! Our Featherwood Guard’s Nantong branch also mentioned Xu’s name for acquisition!”

1. Take advantage of you without your consent: 想/上. I had to do some digging to understand what this means. From what I found, it is exactly what I have translated it as, but it also has the context of “rape” or “forcing oneself on another, no matter what the other does”.

2. 摸金校尉 - literally: Steal Gold Captain. This word has its roots way back during the Three Kingdoms period. From what I read, this rank was devised for people to take wealth from tombs to supply the army with. A tricky bit about this here is the rank of captain. Depending on what time period, be it early Han, or Tang, the rank has a higher status or medium status respectively. Can be thought of as either a rank just below general or captain respectively.

3. Accompany straight through eating, chatting, and sleeping. This is a Chinese idiom that I had a tough time deciding to localize or not, but I decided against it, but we will see. Refers to an idea that a woman accompanies a client through eating, chatting, and sleeping, so pretty much it refers to an idea of following straight through with everything. This is the newer version. The old version had dancing instead of sleeping. Boy, times have changed.

4. 下里巴人永远做不了阳春白雪 this refers back to two different songs during the warring states period that represent the ideals of art between different states. From what I read, 下里巴人 refers to an everyday music/song for the common folk. 阳春白雪 - in kind, refers to art/music for the noble class. In this way it kinda separates the ideas of the nobility/common men.

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Extended note: In ancient times, the Featherwood Guard was simply known as the Imperial Guard, the defenders of the Emperor's Court.