Doomed to be Cannon Fodder

Hey readers! 

Wonderful news! Bone Painting Coroner is back!!! Our EXCEPTIONAL novel lead, Choufleur, will be releasing 3 chapters a week, between Friday to Sunday!! The BPC team has been gradually expanding so that they can post more frequently. So don't be surprised to see a few new names!   

Ji Yunshu was an outstanding anthropologist who was transmigrated into the body of a mistreated young girl. To survive in her new circumstances, she could only rely on her wits and the knowledge she had accumulated in her...

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Index
Chapter 61: Punishment, Supporting Male Visits a Patient
Chapter 62: Clever, Jiaoyue Hides His Feelings
Chapter 63: The Lin Family’s Gifts of Gratitude
Chapter 64: Borrowing Someone, Strategically Asking Old Madame For Help
Chapter 65: The Little White Bunny Will Be Eaten Sooner or Later
Chapter 66: Demanding a Person, Strategically Asking Old Madame
Chapter 67: The Fatty Meat Flies Away Right Before Eating
Chapter 68: Dishes－Sour, Sweet, Bitter, Spicy
Chapter 69: Friendly, Getting Along Harmoniously
Chapter 70: A Little Drink of Wine

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Notes

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You can also send an e-mail if your fanfic is on here, and it is not credited to you, if you prefer to stay anonymous, or update the author info.

Some of the fanfics were sent by other readers, and may be edited by them.

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Chapter 66: Demanding a Person, Strategically Asking Old Madame^top

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By Rabbit the Hooded (rbbt) (@disqus_disW3oT8U8)

Somewhere in the Prince Manor:

Ye mama: this servant reports, the ship will sail tonight!

Old madame: hur hur, the day nears that I will hold my grandchildren!

*Ye mama and old madame settle with popcorn*

Meanwhile...

LH: let's eat.(gods of war, please remove the cockblock)

BX: not this development again.

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By Rose

LH: *licking his lips* time to eat! :3

BX: huoerrr TwT save meee!

Servant A: ahem... the miss is required elsewhere

LH: 😐😐😡😡😬😬😬😠😠

Servant B: ahem... madams orders... 😈😎 *superpower*

LH: buut...buuut....buuut 😯😯😢😢😢

BX: YES!!

LH: did u say something? 😿

BX: who me? Nuuup 😉😇 *hurries away*

Madam Ye: fighting LH! Dont give up!

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By Yukino o (@yukinoo)

LH: Tonight I'll get to feast on the little rabbit meat!

Servant A: Prince, someone need your presence

LH: Fine, I'll feast on her later

-Later-

LH: This time fo...

Servant A: Prince, someone important need fourth miss to be somewhere

LH: ...Fine

-Much later-

LH: *look around vigilantly*

Servant A: Prin...

LH: DIE! (stab servant A)

Servant A: Why...?

LH: I don't care anymore, I'll feast on her now!

Servant B: Prince, did servant A tell you yet that fourth miss got kidnapped?!

LH: Mo*herfu*ker

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By sueita (@sueita)

‘Seriously, male lead what's wrong with you? This story certainly had taken the wrong turn isn't it? No matter how you're the female lead's man. I'm just a side character'

Suddenly Bai Xiangxiu feels her chest tightens, she felt like crying when she imagine her future after he married miss lin. The male lead she remembered would certainly dotes only the female lead and he would dismiss all the concubines he had in his house after he married her.

Thinking up to this point the tears welling up due to the pain after coliding with Long Heng's back slide down here face so slowly.

This ne Bai of his with tears on her face really had rise the flag in side him. "why did you cry? Does it hurt so much?" he asked Bai Xiangxiu while his thumb gently wipes her tears.

This small yet gentle gestures made her sobs harder while Long Heng was at loss thinking what could be wrong.

'is she afraid of me that much? Am I really that scary?'

He gently pulled her into his embrace trying to coax her. He kissed her forehead gently.

He lifts her chin to face him. That teary eyes with red nose was so devastatingly beautiful to the point he wished he would kiss her right here right now. But he held back. He don't want to scare her even more.

"tell me, why did you cry?" his eyes were so gentle Bai Xiangxiu can't believe what she saw. "I'm happy you were nice to me"

Nice to her? That's the reason she cried? Is she so happy he's nice to her that she cried? So she's this much in love with him is she? The thought that came to him made him lost control as he placed his lips againts her lips and kissed her softly...

Ye mama:ooh.. It's began.. Chews on pop corn

Xiao shi: ye mama, I bet it won't be long before we would receive the happy news. Oh BTW, I need to prepare the special undergarment made from the lace Prince Li had bought for ne Bai. *quickly gets off and leave

Madame: she's so attentive I ought to raise her pay. *looks at the departing Xiao shi.

Ye mama: BTW madame how long do you intend to crouch behind the bushes? It unsightly to spy on your own son making love.

Madame: if it's unsightly for me than even more so to you ye mama. Which servant dared to spy on their Master's private affair like this while eating popcorn?

Meanwhile... Bai Xiangxiu had frozen on the spot from the kiss... While Long Heng don't know what to do next.

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By Jipan (@disqus_5Bv28f49Fq)

After kissing BX nose, the prince then continue walking.

LH: uh, I want to hold her hand. But... How? *thinking furiously*

BX: *walking quietly while her heart throbbing madly* uh, why is he kissing me? Am I going to get eaten tonight? *thinking and blushing*

LH: F it, I'll just hold her hand *grabbing BX hand*

BX: oh! Whhh.... P, Prince?

LH: I just want to hold your hand *ear turned red*

BX: a, al, alright *blushing furiously *

LH: *So cute... *

And so they walk together to Winter Garden like that.

In the bushes...

Ye Mama: hohoho it's happening! It's happening!

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By Bib

Bai Xiangxu had no idea what the prince was thinking. The pain from her nose causing her eyes to sting. As she was inwardly cursing herself for having transmigrated into such a frail beauty, she felt a warm breath on the tip of her nose. She looked up at the blushing male lead and realized what had happened. 'Huh. What? Did the cold and stoic man in front of me really just do what I think he did?' Before Bai Xiangxu could think any further, she suddenly felt soft lips pressed against hers. The kiss was clumsy and gentle but with a sense of urgency. The prince was a bit hesitant at first but then gradually deepened the kiss and savored her lips. She became light headed and felt as if her legs were turning into jelly. She would have collapsed if not for the prince holding her tightly by the waist. Har.. Har... Har...

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By Diantha (@disqus_d1qqNPsbkr)

LH: I want to...but she is just so fragile..she can't even walk! What to do, what to do, I don't want to break her...*stares at Ye Mama* "Servant, escort your Mistress to my mansion! Make sure, she does not fall or does not choke on anything or does not run into anything or..."

BX: *indignant* Am I a child?

LH: *Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii~* No, but made of the finest porcelain

BX: *blushes and escorted away*

LH: "Ye Mama, what to do?!"

Ye Mama: Can't disappoint Old Madame. Have to make sure there will be little princes and princesses...but Miss is really just so fragile...

And thus the first Eat the 🐇 without breaking it council commences.

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By Jun Huang Yuuko (@JunHuangQ)

LH : kissing BX's nose

( hmm I want to kiss those cute red lips as well)

😫😫

...

LH: Should I? Or not?😵??

BX: should you what? 😮??

LH: oho I said it out loud. So.. should I? 😏

BX: NO!! (Immediate scared answer. Whatever it is. ) 😲😲!!

LH: but i want to?

Meanwhile:

In a shrub, crouching ye mama, Xiao shi, and servants

Ye Mama: my legs are already cramping up.when are they gonna kiss on lips already?

Xiao Shi: Should i dismiss those servants I just called?

Old Madame: Any progress in here? (Crouching as well)

Ye Mama: your late madame. Even the readers are already assembled here. (Looks at the wide eyed, heavy breathing readers, fully geared with pom poms and banners just in case)

Old Madame: I bought some popcorn.

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Chapter 67: The Fatty Meat Flies Away Right Before Eating^top

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By FableCat (@fablecat)

FableCat brought a real rabbit and stood a few foot behind Long Heng. It caught attention of a few maiden.

Maiden A: Soo cuteee.. Where did you get it?

FableCat: A wolf almost goble it up but it was like god want to save this little one.

Maiden B: oh what happen?

FableCat: A Song servant accidentally tripped. All vegetables and watermelon fell from his basket. They fell on top off the wolf when it was about to take a bite on the rabbit .

Maiden A: very lucky.

FableCat: Very lucky indeed.

Her eyes wandered towards Long Heng's back when he snapped his chopsticks into two with one hand. She came here was actually to add salt to his wounds. Seeing as it was accomplished. She placed the rabbit to Long Heng hands.

FableCat: Be gentle, less temper, or it might run away into another man's arm.

Long Heng stopped his hand from giving the rabbit to Song Jue. Is this random girl trying to hint smtg to him?

She smiled and left the scene. Cant wait for him to succeed. Start to refresh the page for a new chapter.

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By Jo (@JoveyJo)

thump* *thump*

LH: "when will I have my meat?!"

BX: "sorry but I'm vegetarian..."

LH: "so not today?"

BX: .....

LH: "tomorrow..?"

BX: .....

LH: "ever?!!!"

BX: *pat* *pat*

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By Jun Huang Yuuko (@JunHuangQ)

LH: This meat!! Already prepared, marinated and just a bite away but still cannot!!!!!

Readers: (still on the shrub crouching) quickie cough*cough*

LH: what did you say? (Parting the shrub into two, revealing the wilted readers, some passed out, some crying, some with molds. )

Readers: your highness, tell that page boy that you'll need to prepare first and no need to mr. Song to accompany BX. You'll go with her later. Then you know.. Do the deed *whispers.

We'll take care of the things you needed. Just please help me gawd. Do it already!!

LH : seems plausible. (Puts back the shrub the way it is)

Clears throat "we will need more time to prepare-"

Page boy: I.. I hear your conversation with the unknown life force on the shrub. We'll do as they says.

LH: you just interrupted me but its good you understand now go! Dont waste my time. We still need to do.. What is it called again?

Readers: quickie ( all whisper-shouting at the same time )

BX: thought to herself- Nooooooo take me!!!! 😭😭😭

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By Jippy Martini (@jippymartini)

Later on...

SJ: So are you coming to the feast?

LH: You made me miss my feast. I was going to eat a white rabbit.

SJ: What?

LH: *walks away*

SJ: *left behind very confused*

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Jipan (@disqus_5Bv28f49Fq)

So it's decided that SJ will accompany eldest sir Song and BX.

SJ: she is so beautiful...

BX: *feeling shivers in her back. She glance behind with doe eyes*

SJ: oh those eyes... Why there are sorrow on them?! I guess I put it there...

And so Madame Song would find her son drown once again in wine.

SJ definitely turned into drunkard.

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Chapter 68: Dishes－Sour, Sweet, Bitter, Spicy^top

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By Fantasy Magician (@fantasymagician)

Long Heng *slam a bottle of wine* Drink my friend, the night is still young.

Song Jiaoyue: *Stare at the gigantic bottle* the cup?

Long Heng: You don't need it.

Song Jiaoyue: What did I do?

Long Heng: You're interrupting my meal, now drink!

Song Jiaoyue: *gulp* Okay... my bad.

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By Jun Huang Yuuko (@JunHuangQ)

LH: drank a cup. "Do you admit to your sins?"

SJY: (interrogation as soon as i entered??) Hmm.. I plead half not guilty.

LH: Then aren't you guilty!?

SJY: i have the rights to remain silent.

LH: will you drink or im gonna make you?

SJY: drinks without a second thought*

LH: good

SJY: cries suddenly

LH: what da? Are you crying?

SJY: sniff* hiccupps*

You want to eat meat!! But I also want to eat vegetable!! 😭😭 passed out*

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By Jipan (@disqus_5Bv28f49Fq)

Yue Se: oh prince... *watching SJ sleeping with sad heartbroken eyes*

Then caressing his cheek, she murmur, "why you had to fall for her? Although she is one fine woman, she isn't someone you can have... Ah, prince..."

Then slowly she stand and walk out of his room. Before closing the doors, she threw last sad glance to the sleeping prince. Holding back tears, she softly said, "Sweet dream, my prince. I wish you happiness".

In their room, tears she desperately hold broke. Seeing her silent tears, her sisters can't hold back their tears too. They rush to hug her. But although their tears flowing like mountain rivers in spring, there are no sounds can be heard. Only the night and the moon witness their heartbroken cry...

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Chapter 69: Friendly, Getting Along Harmoniously^top

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By Erogami (ShipMaker) (@erogami)

After the successful banquet....

Madame song came to meet old madame. The two sat across each other as they drank tea, the first to say something was madame song.

MS : "big sis, thank you for lending fourth madame. Thanks to her, the banquet was successful."

OM : "hehe, I see. My daughter-in-law is formidable, isn't she?"

A smug smile appeared on OM's face. Truly a good girl, she is, thought OM. Suddenly MS face grew serious.

MS : "Big sis, I have a request."

OM : "what is it?"

Said OM with big smile. But her smile disappeared with MS next word.

MS : "can you give fourth madame to me?"

OM : "..........."

Give her? Who? BX? To MS? Hell no! If she's gone, where could she, OM, get her grandchild from? That jinx, liu daughter? Or that trash concubines?

OM : "no, BX is my daughter-in-law. I won't give her to anybody!"

Said OM as she stared at MS fiercely. MS already expected this and had no plan to just gave up, MS stared back at OM with same ferocity. She was determined to get BX as her chef.

Meanwhile the same situation was playing at LH courtyard. In LH courtyard, LH and SJ hold their swords as they faced each other.

LH : "not only you interrupt me when I was about to eat her, now you want to take her from me? Hah, never thought there would be a day I would cut you down myself."

SJ : "LH, sorry. But I just can't forget her, so I will take her from you."

LH : "keep dreaming!"

Then the two fought.

Meanwhile, BX was resting and playing with huo'er, when suddenly she felt chill.

Huo'er : " mistress?"

BX : "nothing, it's okay." Why do I feel like a bunny being lusted by two wolfs?

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By Majii (@disqus_wxdmkFoYpY)

Random reader: Madame Bai!! Cook me a few dishes toooo!!!!

We'll promise to help c*ckblock the Prince IF YOU DO!

BX: Really??

RR: Of course!

BX: Wait a sec. *goes off to cook

LH *Emits evil aura.

RR: Ha. Haha. Hahahaha! *sweats

LH: You were saying?

RR: P-prince Li, you sh-shouldn't!! You can't!! Madame Bai already agreed!! If she knows you spilled our blood, she'll faint again!! *hugs Huo'er*

LH: *emits more evil aura*

RR: WAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! MADAME BAI!!!

By Diantha (@disqus_d1qqNPsbkr)

LH: "You are FORBIDDEN from even THINKING about dishes!"

BX: "But...why? Did Madame Song complain?"

LH: "She praised you to high heavens."

BX: Okay, she is a foodie, so that was a no-brainer. "Did Master Song complain?"

LH: "He was ecstatic."

BX: "Well, okay, then. Did the GUESTS complain?"

LH: "They fell in love with your dishes."

BX: "So....WHY?"

LH: "They all asked Old Madame to have you cook for them. They all promised favours and treasures and praised Old Madame for her insight."

BX: "And...that is bad?"

LH: "YES! When will I get to eat a white rabbit if this keeps going on?!"

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Chapter 70: A Little Drink of Wine^top

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By Rabbit the Hooded (rbbt) (@disqus_disW3oT8U8)

Song estate

BX: sister shall teach you some vegetarian dishes!

Concubines: yes sister! *We're being healed*

Song estate

LH: accept it, accept my love...

SJ: no, ah, no...~

* Too drunk to block winecup*

LH: drink it, drink it all!

SJ: Hhmm!-Cough-cough... Gulp...*drinks it all*

SJ: *pant... pant* *shuffles Away*

LH: where are you going little song? It's time for the twelfth round... *Hur, hur*

The men had a wild night.

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By Diantha (@disqus_d1qqNPsbkr)

BX:Omg, omg, FINALLY someone who understands my sense of humour!

BH: Truly two of a kind! Let's be friends!

BX: BFFs! *hugz*

And while the women (sans Yu Se who will be constantly close to a heart attack) are merry and meet often...

LH: Can't see her!

SJ: Can't have her!

LH, SJ, Old Madame, Madame Song: I want her!

By Fantasy Magician (@fantasymagician)

Bai He: Come here... Madame Xiu...💕 We will treat you kindly💕 There's no stick beating madame and prince in our place~ We will be sister and serve our marvelous young master... Stay with us forever...

Bai Xiangxiu: *gulp* But... as Prince Li's concubine, I..

Bai He: *giggle* 😘 Don't be shy, Madame Xiu... we even share same 'Bai' character, it must be fate.

Bai Xiangxiu: Uhm, I am sorry but-

Bai He: *Cries* Oh... are you rejecting me and our young master? 😢

Bai Xiangxiu: Yes- uhm... I mean...

Bai He: ( つ Д ｀,）Hic! Sob!

Bai Xiangxiu: I...

Long Heng: They're stealing my WIFE!!!

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By FableCat (@fablecat)

Huo er: Master... why is young master song went on top of a lady. They are making thump thump and ghost sounds. Are they playing game? Huo er wants to join too.

Huo er began to dictate the conversation between the couple to BX.

BX: ..... remind me to ask Mr Song to put his cactus in the living room....

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